Feeling, Writing, and Nothing
So I’ve really had a lot of things to write about lately, and so many things that I’ve wanted to write. But somehow, I sit down to write, then decide to do something else instead. Then I’ll stay on the computer ’cause I wanna write, but end up just sitting here doing nothing. I don’t know what’s up. So I’m gonna finally make myself write some stuff out. Maybe it’ll help me feel better.
So for the past several months, my life has been sliding down the neverending spiral of depression. I know the way out, and recently decided to take it. But I’m having a hard time getting started. I want to be spending more time reading the Bible and talking with God, but I’ve been killer busy with work this week and when I get home I feel too tired to do it. I know it’s just a copout, but that’s what I’m doing. I just need a boost in the right direction.
I suppose I should mention a good friend of mine since I’m thinking about her and she really fits in to the story of “Me vs Depression.” Her name is Sara and she’s been doing an amazing job at keeping my head above water through all this. I’m not sure if she knows it, but she’s been a better friend to me than anyone else I’ve ever met. I’d ask her to marry me, but I think we’re already married. At least we had Katie believing we were engaged :). Good times… (sorry, that was an inside joke for my camp friends). I know she’ll read this because she’s my most active and devoted reader. So Sara… Thanks for being there for me. It’s been a pleasure.
Ok, mushy stuff over (even Sara can’t take too much of that). I think I’m gonna write a post about work today, work on a couple new IFAQ’s, and go to bed.
Hve fun!
April 10th, 2005 at 2:29 pm
This comment has been edited out
Subject: Somebody yelling at Steve
Reason for deletion: Because I can. Besides, it was a personal note and did not need to be displayed here. I read it, and believe that my reading it was the intention of the anonnymous writer, so all parties have been satisfied.
April 10th, 2005 at 11:40 pm
What the heck? First of all,maybe you need to read some more posts and find out just HOW FAR I’ve come to get to the point I’m at. Then think that maybe Steve is TRYING to do all those things right now, and that you YELLING at him is making him feel more like a faliure. Had you left your real E-mail and not posted annonomously, I would have E-mailed this to you and just deleted your post.
Just remember who holds the power of the DELETE key on this site.
So, if you’re bold enough, care to E-mail me and tell me what this is all about? ‘Cause it’s not about this post, is it? What else have I said to you that made you think you needed to write what you did?
April 26th, 2005 at 10:55 pm
I have been where you are so I know how you are feeling. I would like to give you a word of advice that I have learned from spening over 2.5 years being this way. Get over yourself. Stop writing these silly posts trying to get people to feel bad for you. If you really want to get things better, take the time to tell God how you are feeling instead of all the peope out there on the internet who really dont care. Ya maybe there is a few but mostly they just know that they have it pretty bad too. You have to realize that you are not the only one in the world with a problem. Try to help others a little and it will boost your self esteem more then you could ever think. Pray about it. Ive been there and I will be praying that you will be able to climb your way out with Gods help. You have to get the ball rolling.