Here are two more “Infrequently Asked Questions” about animals.

How many mice does it take to screw in a lightbulb? From Matt.

Well, this question is one that has been on my mind for the past 14 seconds, and I gotta tell ya: It’s not an easy one. To answer it, I will need to test it scientifically. For that, I need supplies…
“The best place always to buy a mouse is directly from a private or hobbyist breeder but this may not always be possible and therefore many mouse owners buy their first mouse from a pet shop.”

So off to the breeders I go to collect a few mice for the expirament… but on the way I got distracted and forgot. So all of my test results come from running the tests in my head. I assure you that they are completely accurate… kinda.

So far in the testing, we’ve lost three lightbulbs and poor little “Mouse No. 483” has lost an eye. So I named him winky. The test results, however, are astonishing. Apparently, when mice try to change lightbulbs, they climb up on each other to form a tower to the lightbulb. That was predicted. But it was when one of them ran and got drinks that I knew I had an important discovery on my hands. All in all, it was a productive study. Here are the results:

• Mice prefer Pepsi to Coke
• Mice are social drinkers
• Mice are funny on caffeinne
• Mice hate being called mouses
• 3 out of 4 mice do not smoke
• Winky can make a mean cup of coffee
• Mice cannot drive tractors

And most importantly:

• Mice cannot screw in lightbulbs

If Human communication is so much more complex than Animal communication, why can’t humans understand animals? From Tom

Well, Tom, it’s like this: Not understanding animal communication is not so much a lack of intelligece, but a lack of observation. For instance, many animals communicate by using body language and other subtle gestures that humans can’t, or don’t want to pick up on. Chances are, you understand a lot more than you think you do. How do you know your dog wants to go outside? How do you know it is playful or angry? You know by what you pick up on from body language and sound.

As for the unobservable, we can’t understand it ’cause we can’t see/smell/hear/taste/feel it. Some animals emit pharimones or sounds that are undetectable by the human body. We cannot be expected to understand what we cannot observe. The same limitation applies to communication between genders of the human species. Men don’t understand a lot of women’s communication because we can’t observe it :). Same principle.

Another reason we think we can’t understand is because we just get basic ideas from animals instead of complete thoughts. We are used to communication with other humans, so when an animal communicates, we assume we’re missing something. When a dog growls, it’s telling other dogs “I’m angry.” We understand that, but think that there must be more to it. Trust me… there’s not.

In short, we can understand much of animal communication. Most of what we don’t understand is either unobservable by us, or really isn’t taking place, except in our imaginations.

See the entire IFAQ page

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