Top of the Afternoon to Ya

As much as I feel like a shmuck for not writing regular updates so all my Michigan people know what’s going on over here, I will not be posting an update. Why? Well, if I tell you, it would defeat the purpose.

Now with that as an intro, I bring you: House of Food Fine American Dining.

Here in America, we practically organize our food by nationality. We cook Lasagna and have an Italian meal. We order Chinese. We eat at a Mexican Restaurant. And don’t forget that All-American A&W. Well, this all got me thinking… What would it be like to open an American food restaurant in some foreign country? Like China! Here is what I think the average customer’s experience would be.

You walk in and are immediately struck by the smell of greasy deep fryers. As you look around at the walls, you see a few American flags, pictures of the White House, a lake in the mountains, and a painting of a cute house with a white picket fence. The tables and booths are straight out of a 50’s diner, and are each adorned with ketchup, mustard, and napkins. The hostess is a blond American girl who speaks Chinese very well, but with a noticeable American accent. As she takes you to your table, you notice that you can see back to where the cooks are making the food. A bunch of white guys speaking only English. The menus are all written in Chinese, except for the titles of each dish. They have funny names like “Hamburger” and “French Fries.” Your waiter has a little bit heavier of an accent than the hostess, and his grammar is pretty bad. He has to repeat himself several times throughout your meal. When you get you bill, the waiter informs you that you will pay the cashier up front. The cashier repeats your order, but she might as well be speaking English because you have no idea what she just said. You smile, nod, and hand her your credit card.

It’s interesting to try to put yourself into the shoes of a foreigner trying to make it in America, isn’t it?

2 Responses to “Top of the Afternoon to Ya”

  1. Lorelei Says:

    Just remember, it’s not just the Michigan-ites who love your updates! 🙂

  2. John Ambrose Says:

    Favorite line right here: “…but she might as well be speaking English because you have no idea what she just said…” lol 😛

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